Thursday, May 24, 2012

And so it Begins...

I only have one week left (according to my due date. Really that could mean nothing) until this baby comes and so the comments begin. Although, I guess I've been getting comments the entire time, they just go in phases, so really a new phase of comments begins. Here are some of the awesome things people are saying to me:

"Oh, look at your feet!" (yes that's right. My feet are like memory foam, but that doesn't mean that I enjoy you pointing that out to me. If I point it out to you then you can comment on it, but you cannot comment on them before I do!).
"You look so tired..." (wouldn't you be if for the first time in your life ever you weighed 200 Ibs?!)
"If you want to induce labor, this is what you have to do....." (lets face it, I don't believe any of that stuff. I mean really, how is drinking pineapple juice going to make my water break?)
"You're still pregnant?" (gosh you are so observant!)
"Getting close aren't you?"
"It's almost time isn't it?"
"Are you dilated? How much?" (Do you understand what you just asked me? You are asking me about the inner workings of my vagina. Do you really want to know? Really?!)
And my all time favorite that seems to mostly be mentioned by perfect strangers or people that I don't know very well...."Don't go into labor here, I don't want to have to deliver that baby!" (OK, listen, I don't think that I would allow my labor to progress enough that I would let a complete and total stranger who wasn't some kind of a medical professional get even close to my yoo-hoo! So, why would I depend on you to deliver this baby?)

The worst thing about all this is that most of these comments are from people who I hardly know, or don't even know at all. I just don't understand what makes a perfect stranger think that they are allowed to comment on ANYTHING involving my large girth that also happens to be a baby.

So, the next time you see a pregnant woman, don't ask dumb questions, compliment them and make them feel good about themselves. Pregnancy is not unicorns and rainbows, so chances are the are feeling pretty miserable.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Yet Another Silly Comment from Someone Encountering a Pregnant Lady

The other day I was at the grocery store mulling over an ice cream purchase. I'm certain that I might have looked deep in thought or maybe just focused, but I don't think that I had a look of discomfort or pain on my face. I just take my ice cream purchases pretty seriously these days, that's all! A random women came rushing over to me in a fit of panic saying, "OH MY GOSH I KNOW THAT LOOK! Has your water broke?! You're not going to give birth right here are you?!"
"Oh no, I'm totally fine, I'm just trying to decided on which ice cream to buy. No worries," I replied (very calmly I might add).
"Are you sure?! Sometimes you never know when it's going to happen!" she replied, certain that she was going to be the lucky lady to save the day.
"No really, I'm totally fine. I'm just really serious about my ice cream purchases," and then I quickly walked away...